Monday, November 10, 2008

Precious Life

Life goes by SOOO fast. I don't think I really understood how precious our lives are until I had Jackson. Truly, moments flash by. I was updating my Myspace page, and it has just completely hit me how my little baby is a full on toddler....where did it all go? How did it all happen? I'm lucky, truly, that I am a photographer and that I purposfully captured nearly every moment of his life so far. People made fun of me in the beginning...that's fine...but I can look back and SEE and FEEL and CHERISH those moments that I would have otherwise forgotten.

Tonight, I'm working on wedding albums...finally. I haven't had much time the last few weeks, and the weeks LITERALLY fly by. I feel like the summer was just days ago, and it's already NOVEMBER. I'm sitting here, in the quiet, downstairs in the dining room (I moved my computer today for a bridal consult). Jackson went to bed hours ago, and about 20 minutes ago, I hear him cry out from the stairs "Where'd my momma go?! my momma gooooo?!" he had gotten scared b/c I was not in my typical 2 places (my room, my office) and I heard him walk to both looking for me. So he came down and has been sitting on my lap, just watching me, all cuddled up. Today he said "I want you. I want my momma." Somehow, these words are so precious to me. Days go by and you wonder if your kids really like you. Honestly. You feed them, bath them, clothe them, and I get hugs all the time, don't get me wrong. But just to be wanted and held and cuddled...that's enough for me.

We danced in the living room tonight. Just us. I have a few songs that I LOVE and they lull Jackson: Never Alone, Nothing Fancy, It Won't be Like This, This Years Love....30 minutes. Just us. Quiet. Calm. I loved it. It's THOSE times that I hate working, and honestly, I put everything on hold for THOSE moments. Most of my clients know that. And they understand.

He won't be this little for long...that song is so true. I shoot weddings all the time, and you know what I think about constantly through out them all: What will Jackson's wedding be like? What song will we dance to? Will Adam give a big speech? Will I make it through their vows without blubbering? I know, I think of weird stuff, but dancing with Jackson tonight made me really think about 20+ years from now our Mother/Son dance and how fast that time will come....

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